VPC Went Vegas Day 6; The Casino Crawl

It’s 7:30 AM and I’m in a slight panic. I took sleeping pills at 3 AM. 5 AM. And 7 AM. Minutes of sleep so far? Zero. My pills are obviously not heavy so I’m no immediate danger of dying but this not sleeping has me worried. Insomnia really affected my 2010 trip badly and I don’t want that to happen once again. I’ve been to every continent except Oceania and I sleep perfectly everywhere on this planet except for this godforsaken bitch in the middle of the desert.

One look at Baars staring at the ceiling tells me all I need to know about the money I left him with last night. Today we’re going on our Casino Crawl. Mission is to drink and gamble at every Strip Casino. Guaranteed good times. After breakfast / lunch at the Showcase Food Court we stuff our bag pack with cold Budweiser’s and start crawling. First stop MGM Grand. The tactics for today are simple; a well thought out combo of Nelis* - Arno** - Duh Mat*** & D’n Beitol**** roulette.

* Nelis = Niels Fleuren (nr. 5). Left Full Back of our local soccer club. Famous for having the worst haircut in the western hemisphere.
** Arno = Arno Arts (nr. ?) very slow midfielder that used to play for our club. Late for every single duel on the pitch. Therefore Arno’s number is the last number that hit before we place our bet.
*** Duh Mat = Sandro Calabro (nr. 14). Former striker of our club. Famous for decreasing Iebus’s net worth by 50% every three months.
**** D’n Beitol = John Feskens (nr. 3). Retired football player that never played for our club. Ugly as f*ck though so popular within the VPC.

We also bet the number eight. No idea why really but who gives a rats ass when we pot that eight ball in the corner pocket on the very first spin? Right on the kisser. We bet $ 20,- per spin - $ 4,- per number - so we are up $ 120,- after the first Casino. Good start.

As per usual Baars did not make it to the start of our Crawl due to….being Baars. We send him to every casino we are about to spin at but never find him. After an hour we just tell him to go sit on a bench at New York New York and wait till we arrive there. We brick at Tropicana, Mandalay, Luxor and Excalibur before meeting up with Baars. Baars can’t use the ATM today until 15:30 so he’s eyeballing his watch every 13 seconds during this Crawl.

No sleep and a can of Budweiser per resort have my memory against the ropes here. I remember reloading Budweisers at the ABC Store across from Monte Carlo. Next clear memory is a group picture that is taken in front of Fraties favourite Vegas restaurant; Beijing Noodles No. 9 aka Kwok at Caesars.

After a short Pizza break at Treasure Island we try to ditch Damvic at the McDonalds in front of Slots – A – Fun. I think we had one more hit till we reach the likes of Circus Circus. This dump has a special place in the heart of the Filty Few as it was our first Vegas residence in 2009. After bricking the pot dollars few us decide to let it ride on the roulette waiting for the cocktail waitress to return with eight Corona’s.

As a Vegas Fanboy it hurts to see the closed doors at a 1955 icon like Riviera. Either blow the place up or open that classic but don’t leave her hanging like this. Anyway, we brick at Encore but bink a 14 at Wynn and get lost inside the casino. After we go outside and move to the next Casino we bink another direct hit when we realise we are actually still at the Wynn about 30 feet from the last roulette table we played at. I’m sure Steve will recover from the hit. On our way over to Palazzo we experience some headwinds which cause the few hairs left on Damvic’s skull to stand up straight. Iebus and I try to film the ordeal but our vain boy runs for the hills.

We brick at Palazzo and Venetian before crashing at the Venetian food court. I’m spinning on my feet from an alcohol / hyperventilation combo. The rest of the group is falling apart as well. Damvic and Wum want to go Spearmint but since it’s 21 hours the afternoon shift might still be working so they wait it out. I want to just not move. Bozzie wants to skype with Moon. Baars has $ burning in his pocket since 15:31 PM. Jelzo agrees, then disagrees, agrees again to finally disagree on the strip club idea. Despite running hot spirits are suddenly broken.

Hugo however doesn’t seem to agree with the waving the white flag strategy all that well as he storms off angry about four times in 15 minutes. We have to hold Hugo upside down to retrieve the group money and divide the loot. Damvic goes in full mediation mode but the angry ship has sailed and Hugo is very much on board. Whatever. Few of us grab a cap to Excalibur where I think I played some poker before crashing. Others make their way to the piano bar in New York New York before heading to the Strip clubs. Good day out that. Now shoot me.